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The Final Four: Linguistic Pitfalls Part Two

Seems like some of my readers are paying attention and that's awesome. I wrote part one of this article a while back. It talks about eight common and avoidable pitfalls we have in language. In the article I wrote about 'but', 'if', 'try', and 'might' and how these words dilute the power of our language and dull our ability to persuade. Well, a few of my more observant readers noticed that if there are eight pitfalls and I only cited four, there must be four more traps out there with the potential to hurt us. Some readers went so far as to suggest I did this to demonstrate another persuasive technique--open loops.

The open loop, whether intentional or not, seemed to have worked as my assistant was e-mailed and even received one phone call wanting to know the other four.

Well. . . if you've been awaiting in eager anticipation part two, thanks.

The first three of the final four: would have, could have, should have (woulda, coulda, shoulda).

Why are these problematic? First, they're all in the past tense and on the surface, this may not seem like a problem, but they can have an adverse impact on your ability to persuade.

Generally, you want to be leading people into the present time so they can and will act right now. We don't want their heads in the past, we want them with us. To borrow a phrase from Ram Dass, we need them to "be here now." The present is where we're selling, the present is where they're buying.

When we allow our prospects to drift off into nostalgic, there's also the potential to create a whiny atmosphere which has the air of regret. 'I should have taken advantage of that situation. If only I had known. . .'

Number eight of the top eight words . . .

Can't. I can't. Can't is a negation and negations have the potential to pose a serious threat to your persuasive abilities in essence canceling out all that you have worked to achieve. When I was in high school there was one teacher who forbid us from using the word 'can't'. He wasn't having it.

If you were to say, "You can't use negations", this forces your mind to first picture using negations then in some way negating that picture.

When you say, 'I can't sleep', what happens? Well, first off, you definitely can't sleep.

Negations force the mind to think of the one thing you don't want to think about. The most important element to persuasion is to get your prospect imagining themselves, creating a mental image, of them doing what you want them to do.

Words like "can't" create the very image you don't want the person to make.

There are some very powerful and creative ways to use negation -- just be careful that you use it properly or not at all until you're comfortable with it.

Okay. Happy now?

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Kenrick Cleveland teaches strategies to earn the business of affluent prospects using persuasion. He runs public and private seminars and offers home study courses and coaching programs in persuasion strategies. Get your own completely unique content version of this article.

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