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Funny Quotes from Golfers

Golf is a game of glory and humiliation. You can shoot a birdie on one hole and hit it onto the roof of a house on the next. They have yet to build the rollercoaster that can even remotely compare and golfers know it as these quotes show.

1. I learned you can't drink whiskey and play golf. - John Daly

2. If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death. - Sam Snead

3. The only sure rule in golf is - he who has the fastest cart never has to play the bad lie. - Mickey Mantle

4. These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow. - Sam Snead

5. Fifty years ago, 100 white men chasing one black man across a field was called the Ku Klux Klan. Today it's called the PGA Tour. - Unknown

6. When you start driving your ball down the middle, you meet a different class of people. - Phil Harris

7. One of the advantages bowling has over golf is that you seldom lose a bowling ball. - Don Carter

8. Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick. - P.J. O'Rourke

9. Golf is the cruelest of sports. Like life, it's unfair. It's a harlot. A trollop. It leads you on. It never lives up to its promises.... It's a boulevard of broken dreams. It plays with men. And runs off with the butcher. - Jim Murray

10. Golf is not a game, it's bondage. It was obviously devised by a man torn with guilt, eager to atone for his sins.

11. The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. - Billy Graham

12. Play it as it lies is one of the fundamental dictates of golf. The other is Wear it if it clashes. - Henry Beard

13. I've had a good day when I don't fall out of the cart. - Buddy Hackett

14. You have to understand, I don't play golf for fun. It's my business. When the mailman starts delivering mail on his off day, that's when I'll start playing golf for the hell of it. - Lee Trevino

15. The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody put a flagstick on top. - Pete Dye

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Aazdak Alisimo writes for GolfClubCourse.com - your resource for finding golf stores in your area. This article is available as a unique content article with free reprint rights.

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